Quit being hard on yourself. We are what we are; we love what we love. We don’t need to justify it to anyone, especially ourselves. – Scott Lynch
The teacher asks Jimmy:
Teacher: “Jimmy, why aren’t you writing?”
Jimmy: “I don’t has a pencil.”
Teacher: “Jimmy, that’s not a correct sentence. The correct way is: I don’t have a pencil; he doesn’t have a pencil; we don’t have a pencil.”
Jimmy: “Who stole all the pencils then?”
When we feel that those around us are being tough or judgemental, I can guarantee, when you look more closely, they are being tough on themselves.
We are all our own worst critics and judge ourselves harshly at times, believe me I know, I am one of them, but what I have found is that when I do, I am much more likely to judge those around me.
I like the story above because it reminds me that at the end of the day, some things don’t matter. It doesn’t matter if I am not perfect, it doesn’t matter if I sometimes make mistakes or feel inadequate. Remember we are human, we are vulnerable. Sometimes we just need to let it go, lighten up and learn to be gentle and kind to ourselves. Once we do, it will always ripple out to those around us.
46 thoughts on “Be gentle”
A truly beautiful post.
Thankyou Nico. Your comments are appreciated.,🙏🏻
Speaking to me here. You are.
Yes I can see that. Be gentle Mr K 🙏🏻
I find that too, Karen. When I am irritable and judging myself unconsciously, I am more blaming toward others around me. I need to watch that more closely. Thank you Karen. ❤
It is a trap we can all get caught in, but then we remember we are human! and let go, to start a new day! Much love 💚
This post resonates deeply, Karen…
Thankyou Lori. I am slowly learning to let go of the judge in me. It’s a practice for many of us 🙏🏻
Judgment is one of my greatest challenges. We all do it, I guess. Becoming aware of it is the first step and from there I can soften and let it go or choose to entertain another point of view. Practice always! ❤
Yes a practice!! and like you say, there are many other parts of us to honor and love and the more we focus on that, the less likely we will judge. Thanks Eliza. 🙏🏻
I’m from the perfectly imperfect tribe.
They live longer 🙂
Lived this Karen.
They do live longer so true Sawsan!!
I meant to say ‘loved’
Yes and ‘love’ is the only cure for our self-judgement. Thankyou Sawsan.
I believe it could work the other way around too, Karen. When you can stop being judgemental of others, you become more accepting and better able to love yourself.
Absolutely Jennifer on both sides, but normally I find once I let it go in me first, I no longer feel the need to do it to others. Loving ourselves unconditionally takes a lifetime. Thankyou 🙏🏻
I’ve been learning to give up perfectionism too Karen. May we be gentle with ourselves and others, accepting what is with grace.
Exactly Brad, when we realize there is no perfect, we can relax and be who we are meant to be! Accepting and loving what is! Thankyou 🙏🏻
Yes with so many of us Emilie. 🙏🏻
I have gradually accepted there is no perfect, and that has made life so much easier 🙂
Gradual is the key word Helen. It takes time to reprogram our minds. Thankyou ❤️
I don’t think, that perfect exist Karen. If we were perfect, why should we be here? Then there would be nothing to learn…
To let go of judgement isn’t easy, but by being awake, it helps.
It does help Irene. We are here to love and to learn. Thankyou 🙏🏻
This is such an important message, Karen. I’m learning to watch my thoughts. Whenever I find myself being critical of others, I ask what it is I’ve left undone to make me feel so insecure. It helps me recenter and work on my own responsibilities…
Beautifully said Carol. Conscious awareness guides us to heal and learn to love unconditionally. Thankyou 🙏🏻
I love reading your posts for the beautiful, thought-provoking stories and anecdotes at the start ! This one made me smile a little too! Funny Jimmy!
It did me too. When we can look at life like Jimmy, we remember not to take everything so personally, even though not easy at times. Thankyou for your thoughts. 🙏🏻
Excellent lesson, Karen.
We find contentment when we see the importance in all things, yet don’t take anything too seriously; least of all ourselves.
So true. Life is serious enough without any more pressure placed on ourselves! Thanks Alan.
Thank you for this post. The next time I feel anxious or paranoid about something, Ill remember this quote. Im extremely hard on myself. Its annoying.
It is annoying, but with daily practice changing our beliefs and mantras about ourself, I have found it really shifts over time. Thankyou for being here 🙏🏻
I think there are many of us who can relate very well to this post. As much as I always try to think I can be the “stable” one, there are times when I really forget that many things just do not matter, and keeping things simple often is best. Not sure why this is not possible for me at time…sigh 🙂 Thanks Karen, wish you a great day ahead.
Letting go daily no matter how we have been, helps us start again the next morning. I’m pretty sure you are still the stable one Randall! Have a great day. 😎
so important! great post 🙂
Thankyou I appreciate your comment 🙏🏻
I grew up in a household where perfect mattered. Oy. Not until midlife I’ve learned to be gentle with myself–it really does make all the difference in the world.
It’s hard to shift the “perfect” illusion from our minds! I agree it does make a big difference when we let it go. Thanks Kristine. 💚
Thanks Karen I needed to read this one today. Holidays can be challenging when autism comes into play. Sometimes I have to just let go and not judge or think too far ahead. Today as I get closer to my 52nd birthday I am going to celebrate life instead of complaining about age lol. Hugs Kath.
Yes it can be a trying time on holidays! My youngest went back to school yesterday. That’s a good attitude to adopt Kath and a very happy birthday to you when it arrives! Fill your heart with gratefulness and love. 🎉💚🎉
Thanks Karen I will treasure the little moments, we are off to Canberra for the weekend.
Great enjoy 💚
I’m very glad to have come across this blog. I feel with guilt on a daily basis. It’s a compulsive disorder of mine since I was a child. This helped. Thank you
I’m so glad this helped. Thank you 💕
Just spotted this. Thanks. So true and sometimes so difficult,but worth the effort.
Definitely worth the effort Don! Hope you are having a good break 🌈😀