Learning to heal 

We must look at ourselves over and over again in order to learn how to love, to discover what has kept our hearts closed, and what it means to allow our hearts to open.  Jack Kornfield

From a young age we have been taught to believe in love, happy endings and fairytale hopes. 

But where along the way were we taught how to face sickness, death, grief, anxiety, and loss?

Because of this, society is overwhelmed as we struggle to understand how to face these difficult challenges and our inability to trust and know deeply, that if our hearts break open, we will survive. 

Often it’s not until we are drowning in our pain, that we realise we know nothing about this path. Worse still, as we search for answers and support to work through this difficult time, we discover no one else does either! 

Society has trained us to believe that if we unravel or fall apart through these difficult challenges, then at some point we need to tidy it up, push it down or better still, lock it away, as it may make others feel uncomfortable. Besides, how long does it take to get over anyway? 

The answer is there is no timeframe. Each of us has a unique rhythm and timing of suffering and healing.

 Allow space for this pain to arise in you and others. Learn to see what this pain reveals in you, and how it can change your path and create new beginnings. 

Take time to nurture, heal and accept these wounds as part of our journey.

30 thoughts on “Learning to heal 

  1. Our individual process takes whatever it takes. This is a wonderful reminder to us to honor our own process. In a society where grief has an apparent time limit, these ideas of slowing down and feeling our way through is not generally acknowledged or supported. Thank you for this. 💕

  2. Karen, such beautiful comforting words. Yes, time is all we have on this planet, and we each have to respond in our own way. This is the tricky bit! Society asks, demands really, so much more of us, and we have to find that balance between functioning within society and taking care of our own unique needs. This was a great read as I head out the door to start a new grief group of people that have had traumatic loss, a few like yourself, of children. To me that must be the very hardest thing to cope with and move forward, not through or out of, or around, but forward. Thank you for being a shining light for all of us on our life’s journey.

  3. Worthy post, Karen!
    So many ask the question; If God is so loving, then why does He allow suffering? He allows nothing to come to us that has no value. The value in suffering is that when endured it opens to a greater good.
    God’s only Son Himself suffered the Cross for a greater good. The salvation of souls by re-opening the gates of Heaven since closed by original sin. The symbol of the cross and the suffering it represents shouts one phrase: “Love wins!”

  4. We do need time in our own way … and we also need guides on this path on how to deal with loss and grief, emotions and feelings that society doesn’t seem to allow. Thank you for being one of those guides Karen. We must help each other through this terrain that we have not be educated on. 💛🙏💛

  5. Not one soul gets through unscathed and I guess thats the learning curve. That we all deal with the hard stuff in different ways. It’s the best part about being human, we can learn from each other and yet we can still go about it in a way thats right for each individual. Our experience is just that, ours alone. But maybe something we learned can help another soul on their journey too. Have a wonderful Sunday Karen.

    1. It’s true everyone has difficult experiences in life and because we are all connected, even when we have to grieve alone, we can help each other heal in many ways. Hope you have a beautiful day too Kath 🍃💚

  6. There is a difference in becoming well from mental issues and being healed. Real healing from pain and trauma is a very long process. For each person its a different way and they have to take their own time. No one can hurry the process of healing. I am not sure if healing of the past wounds can ever happen completely. As I am also still in the process of healing. I wish I can or someone else can say that some day !!!
    Thank you for your article. Many Blessings of Love and Light from me 🙂 ❤

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