Author: Karen Lang

Counselor/Energy Healer Grief Mentor/Mindfulness teacher/ Author of two books.

Death

by Karen Lang, posted in Uncategorized

Death is not the end
Death can never be the end. Death is the road.
Life is the traveller. The Soul is the Guide  – Rumi

Ask yourself.  Do I fear death? I did for a long time until death faced me.

We would like to believe that death won’t find us. That if we are always on the move and constantly busy we will be okay.  I think that we tell ourselves, Im living a good life so why would death come knocking at my door?

After my first brush with death, I had to face that not only was my 9 year old son not immuned from death, but none of us were.  I realised that my time here on earth was very limited and fragile and that I needed to use my time wisely.  I began to question all my decisions in life and asked myself, “What was important to me now”?

We need to stop making excuses about change and avoiding that decision in our life that we continually postpone.  Making a move on a career change, spending quality time with the children, rather than squeezing another hour at work or taking the holiday that you have always wanted or forgiving a family member you have been angry at for years.

Why do we think that death won’t face us?  I think if we did know it may come at any moment, then we would live differently.

It’s only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth – and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up – that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had.  Elisabeth Kübler-Ross    Death

It seems only on our death-bed or a family member’s death-bed that we start to reflect on our actions in life and how we have treated ourselves and each other.  Knowing our vulnerability, we can begin to see the big picture of life and realise there is more than our ego to worry about.

Once we are awake to our immortality, don’t let fear ease in.  Don’t let the mind dwell on thoughts of how life may end for us or our family, or how we are running out of time.  Don’t let busyness be the distraction to avoid what we know is true.

Learn to slow down and become still.   Silence and meditation will start to show you how you are living your life and this at times is very confronting.  Work through each fear as it arises and learn to trust in a different process.  Confront the unknown we all have to face and don’t wait until your death-bed to see how life could have been different for you.

Waking up this morning, I smile,      
Twenty four brand new hours are before me.     
I vow to live fully in each moment     
and to look at all beings with eyes of compassion.  Thich Nhat Hanh

Giving

by Karen Lang, posted in Uncategorized

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”
― Rumi

If I asked you if you were a giving person, what would you say?  Apparently most people say YES.  What does it mean to be giving?  What conditions do you place on others when you give?

Giving freely isn’t something we achieve easily.  It is a practice that takes a long time to get right and we often need to stop and question our motives behind the giving.  Most of us will find that we are giving with an underlying expectation.

When we give to receive more love, more attention or more recognition, we are giving from a place of fear and a need in ourselves that hasn’t been recognised.  For example, the business man who is constantly seeking the boss’s approval, or the Mother who only gives to her husband and children to receive more love, or the friend who is always there for you but wants the same attention given back to them.

When we are constantly expecting, we will find that we are often disappointed in life and that the world isn’t treating us with the love and care we think we deserve.  It is a common feeling.  How often do you hear people say, “No-one understands how much I give.”  “Why does no-one appreciate or recognise all my hard work?” In fact, when you are giving based on fear, you will never feel satisfied.

When we give from a place of love without conditions, rather from a place of expectations and fear, you will find that not only will you receive exactly what you need but more than you imagined.

I have been guilty of this.  It took me a long time to realise that giving freely means not expecting any outcome, not even a thank-you.  Of course there is nothing wrong with someone thanking you for your kindness, it’s about becoming conscious of your thoughts when you are giving to others.

Ask yourself, “Why don’t I feel appreciated?”.  Ask yourself, “What do I expect from others when I give?”.  If you find yourself saying “when I give…., I want to receive, love, attention, happiness or peace etc, then you are not giving freely from a place in your heart. No matter how hard we search, no-one can fulfill ours needs or expectations.  When we truly learn to love ourselves, appreciate ourselves exactly as we are, then overtime, we can learn to give to others in the same way.

“Do not be satisfied with the stories that come before you. Unfold your own myth.”

Trust there is a process of learning to love yourself.  I have learnt this by becoming still and aware of my thoughts and my expectations.  See and feel what it is that you lack inside and then begin to search how you can fill your heart with love . What you will discover is that you hold the key and in unlocking it, you will receive exactly what you need.

Everything in the universe is within you. Ask all from yourself.”
― Rumi

Humility

by Karen Lang, posted in Uncategorized

Tell me a story of who you are,
And see who I am in the stories I am living. And together we will remember that each of us always has a choice.  Oriah Mountain Dreamer

Humility means being honest about who you are, so that you neither inflate nor underestimate your value.  Are we true to ourselves with friends and family?  Why do we hide behind a shadow of our true potential or pretend we are something more, yet inside, feel we are no-one?

When we become aware of our inner worth, we don’t have to seek our identity outside ourselves or behave with false modesty.

Sounds easy but it’s really hard to do.  I always worried about what others thought of me, I was constantly seeking approval from anyone who would give it to me.  There are always plenty of people who want to give you their opinion but once you start relying on others to tell you how you look or should feel, you start to lose your own identity and become powerless in your decision-making.

“Life is a process of becoming. A combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death.” ~Anais Nin

To understand who you are, you need to be still and empty your mind regularly of  your own preconceptions.  You need to have a new understanding in the evaluation of yourself.  It took the death of my son for me to re-evaluate everything I believed in life but you don’t have to have that experience to wake you up.

There is so much to learn in life about who we are and we are given amazing resources to help us, if we look.  Dont wake up each morning saying to yourself “been there done that” because each day can bring you an awakening of your mind and spirit.  Question your own identity regularly,  “Who do I become when I am with certain friends?”  “Who am I with when I feel I can show my true self? and why?”

When I stopped pretending around my friends and family and started to be exactly who I am,  I began to see people accepting me.  It was the judgement I placed on myself everyday that was  limiting my true potential.  Others were only seeing what I was believing.  Once I changed that thought process, others changed as well.

When we understand that we have the power to choose and believe who we think we are, we can then become confident in showing our true self to others.  It gives you freedom in everything you do and there are no limitations in this truth. When we connect to that truth, we learn to trust in ourselves and life.

It’s incredibly powerful to be confident in yourself and with others.  It also liberates others to see that it can be done.  Dont waste another day hiding this wonderful person that you are!  The world needs you.

You were born with potential. You were born with goodness and trust
You were born with ideals and dreams. You were born with greatness
You were born with wings. Learn to use them and fly!  RUMI

Fear

by Karen Lang, posted in Understanding Fear

It is not that you must be free from
fear.  The moment you try to free
yourself from fear, you create a resistance
against fear.  Resistance, in any form,
does not end fear.  What is needed, rather
than running away or controlling or
suppressing or any other resistance, is understanding fear; that means, watch it,
learn about it, come directly into contact
with it.  We are to learn about fear,
not how to escape from it, not how to
resist it through courage and so on.

J. Krishnamurti

Let fear show itself to you.

When we hide fear, it grows.  The more we pretend it’s not there, the more power it has over us and soon, it starts to control certain parts of your life and freedom.

Let fear show itself to you.

Fear is merely a lie we once told ourselves about someone or something.  A lie, an illusion we convinced ourselves at the time was the truth.

Let fear show itself to you.

For what you will find, is that fear is not that scary, it’s not that big and when you see the lie in front of you, it is only then, you will see the truth.

Let fear show itself to you.

For when you see the truth, you will let the lie and fear go….. for they are one…….

Let fear go…..and receive the freedom you long for.

ABUNDANCE

by Karen Lang, posted in Uncategorized

“You were born with wings, why prefer to crawl through life?”
― Rumi   The Essential Rumi, New Expanded Edition

Alberto Villodo is an amazing author that has taught me so much about understanding who I am and where I am going in life.

The Four Insights: Wisdom, Power, and Grace of the Earthkeepers [Paperback]

The universe always mirrors back to us the conditions of our love and our intent. If we’re fearful that money won’t come to us, it won’t. If we experience abundance by imagining ourselves with plenty, even if we have no money right now, we will have abundance, and we can be sure that the money is on its way to us. This happens because we’re in balance.

So when our life isn’t working for us, the most effective solution isn’t to change our career, spouse, exercise routine, or community, but to work on what we have already. We rid ourselves of the unproductive stories and envision the experiences we’d like to have.

Start to question your inner belief’s about money.  Did you grow up in an environment that made you believe you never had enough?  Did you grow up in an environment where you never worried about money or abundance?  This will clearly define who you are now and why you believe if you are abundant or not.

The shift from poverty into abundance is and always will be, based on your unconscious belief system.  Once you understand that, you need to shift the old belief within you and in doing so, you will allow abundance in.  It’s not just a matter of saying “I want to be rich, bring it on!”.  If you don’t believe that unconsciously, you will not receive it.

Why do you stay in prison, When the door is so wide open?”
― Rumi The Essential Rumi, New Expanded Edition

So become conscious of how you see money.  Am I generous and detached from money?  or Do I hang onto each dollar, wondering where the next will come from?  When you can freely give, even if you are poor, you will freely receive.

I have always found this to be true.  When I let go of my fear of receiving, when I truly trust in an abundant life that I know I deserve, it will come.  Work out where your fears are, if you are not receiving, you are holding a fear, blocking the source of abundance.

When you can see where your fear is, face it.  See the illusion that fear is and let it go.  See how fear controls you, yet it has no truth.  When you find your truth and realise you deserve so much more than you believe, you will become open to receiving the life you wish for.

Your work is to discover your world and then with all your heart give yourself to it.

Buddha