“If you are living out of a sense of obligation, you are a slave.” – Wayne Dyer
How many times have you said to yourself “But I feel so obligated?” It’s a familiar line to me and one that has definitely caused me to be a slave in some aspects of my life.
My sister called me to share how she is letting go of the obligations that have bound her over the years and it challenged me to find the areas in my life where I feel obligated out of fear.
When our sense of obligation is stronger than our sense of self-respect and self-caring then we need to question our motives behind the obligation. Ask yourself what would happen if you didn’t do it? Ask yourself what would happen it you let it go?
The answer is always fear, followed by massive guilt or confrontation. Doing what you have always done has been passed on to you from your parents, grandparents and other family and so there is a natural progression of generational obligation, which is very difficult to remove.
Can you stop doing certain things that take up so much time each week? Where can you give yourself more time? Can you stop trying to please everyone you meet and be exactly who you want to be? It’s not easy to let go and so, if you can start by seeing where you are bound by obligation, then that is a wonderful beginning to releasing this heaviness.
Notice where you allow others to blackmail you or where you feel guilty about what is right for you or your family. When we start to make small steps to live fully in our truth, we will feel lighter and more confident about our journey and our direction in life.
Here are some reasons why we feel obligated:
- Fear of losing a family member or friend’s approval
- Having a family member or friend angry with you
- Getting the “silent treatment”
- Obligation out of guilt
- Doing what has always been done
Heres some reasons why you shouldn’t
- Living your truth will give you freedom
- You will not feel burdened by the needs of friends or family
- You will not feel resentful towards those who you feel obligated to
- You will allow new experiences and more time to do what you want to do
- You will know what you need and this will give you inner power and peace
You are the only one who knows what is right for you. If you cannot express this to others then find why fear is blocking this. Allow stillness in your life to see where you can forgive and have the courage to change what has always been done.
In doing so, you will allow freedom in your life to live your truth.