Author: Karen Lang

Counselor/Energy Healer Grief Mentor/Mindfulness teacher/ Author of two books.

Letting Go

by Karen Lang, posted in Uncategorized, Understanding Forgiveness

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.”  – Steve Marboli

The story below reflects how at times, we all hold onto unnecessary stress and pain in our lives.

I have found that when I am holding onto unforgiveness for anyone or any situation in my life, I feel heavy and burdened.  Forgiveness is the simplest act and yet we hold onto this pain out of an illusion of justice and for the need to protect our ego.

When we decide that living freely and more compassionately is more important that holding on, we can learn to move forward into our true self and true potential.  The lightness you will feel after forgiving and letting go will convince you it’s worth it.

“You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. I tie no weights to my ankles.” – C JoyBell

A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they’d be asked the “half empty or half full” question. Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired: “How heavy is this glass of water?”
Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz.
She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.” She continued, “The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything.”

“Letting go with forgiveness, gives us freedom, and freedom is the only condition for happiness. If, in our heart, we still cling to anything – anger, anxiety, or possessions – we cannot be free.”

Silence is Golden

by Karen Lang, posted in Uncategorized

“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” – Stephen R Convey

Next time you are with someone, watch them, as you listen to them.  Listen with your heart, which means you are connecting to how they feel.  Imagine yourself in their world, where their feelings are valid and although you may not agree with them, listen compassionately.

When you speak and you say something, pay attention to their response. How do they really feel about it?  Don’t just listen to the words, pay attention to them between the words.

Experiment and see how those around you respond differently when they feel you are listening to them.  See the positive reaction in your conversations when you try this approach and perhaps see another side of those that you thought you knew.

“Only from the heart, can you touch the sky.” – Rumi

Most arguments are from not listening to each other and from not allowing others to have their own opinion.  When we feel we need to protect our EGO or refuse to admit we are wrong, we create barriers between those we love.

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”  – Leo Buscaglia

When you truly understand the perspective of others, you are most likely to reach productive outcomes and when people feel heard, you will find your discussions are less argumentative.

Understand that as you begin to change your listening style to a more empathetic one, you may often feel inefficient, so don’t give up after one session.  It takes time to truly hear someone and to replay the essence of their thoughts back.

Overtime as you learn to listen differently and understand those around you, you will find a deeper connection to all those you meet.

“Let the water settle, you will see the moon and the stars mirrored in your being.” – Rumi

Enter into the Stillness

by Karen Lang, posted in Uncategorized

“There is a point where in the mystery of existence contradictions meet; where movement is not all movement and stillness is not all stillness; where the idea and the form, the within and the without, are united; where infinite becomes finite, yet not.”   – Rabindranath Tagore

For a long time my mind was busy even when I meditated.  I would begin my meditation with good intent but after a few minutes, I found I would drift off with thoughts about the rest of the day.  It takes discipline to enter into stillness.

You can work with restlessness by focusing the awareness on a single object such as the breath.  Because a restless mind tends to hop from one object to another, this technique produces a single focus and you cannot focus on the breath and on your thoughts at the same time.

Deep Breathing helps release your stress and creates an inner calmness.   Become aware of your thoughts coming in but also letting them go, knowing that only this moment is important.

Throughout history, cultures have believed in the sacred power of words.  Finding a mantra to chant in your meditation helps keep you focused as well.  Some examples are below, so find one that resonates with you.

Om Shanti Shanti

Aum or Om

Silent repetition of a mantra leads to a deep and profound understanding of its meaning, which is an irreplaceable boost to the spirit behind your chanting.

There are many ways to enter into stillness but most importantly you must “Practice.”  You must learn to discipline your mind from busyness and the more often you practice, the easy this stillness will integrate into the rest of your life.

“Living in the present moment is the full awareness and appreciation of the life we have, right here, right now. Present moment awareness is being aware of what is happening in ourselves and our world instead of being lost in random fears from the past and uncertainties, hopes, and expectations for the future. In the absence of those fantasies we have the opportunity to enjoy our day-to-day living.” – Shannon Duncan

Believe in yourself

by Karen Lang, posted in Uncategorized

“Believe in yourself and all that you are.  Know that there is something inside of you that is greater than any obstacle.” – Christian Larson

I constantly limit myself.  I am learning however, to believe that beneath those limitations, I have a choice to change my old beliefs and work on my true potential.  When people say “Do not be afraid to believe that you deserve what you want in life” or  “Do not be afraid to believe that you are extraordinary,” how many of us believe that is possible.

“As the magnificence of a butterfly can never be diminished, nor will man’s hope be lessened in the face of adversity”

First of all, establish what it is that you believe about yourself and how that is limiting your potential.  Surround yourself with inspiring teachers and read stories about those who have had major adversaries and setbacks in life and yet somehow overcame them.

You have to be prepared to suffer a little to reach your goal.  Doing a little every day adds up to a lot.  The effect will accumulate. You can dream as big as you want to dream.  Just realise that you have to do something about it today.  Ask yourself, “What can I do this day to advance toward my dream?”

“It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not”

There is more than one way to do anything, so when a door closes for you, don’t give up at the first stop sign,  move forward and see how you can look at the situation from a different perspective and work through any obstacles or self-limiting thoughts.

Self-doubt is a sneaky voice that creeps up in your head.  It criticises you when life gets difficult.  It beats you down when you struggle to stand up or when you fall into adversity.   These thoughts are merely illusions of your old self, so strip them from your mind today.

When you find what it is that holds you back, acknowledge your fears and let them go.  Daily practice to re-train you thought process is the hard part but overtime, you will see that it pays off and your dreams, self-confidence and potential will shine through.

“And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.” – Roald Dahl

Buddha Teachings

by Karen Lang, posted in Uncategorized

Teachings of Buddha

The following words of wisdom come from the teachings of the Buddha and those meditation masters who have followed the Buddha’s path of happiness.

May these words and practices bring you inspiration, wisdom, and delight.

Live every act fully, as if it were your last.

Love in the past is only a memory. Love in the future is a fantasy. Only here and now can we truly love.

Most of the sorrows of the earth humans cause for themselves.

Even loss and betrayal can bring us awakening.

Words have the power to destroy or heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world.

Every wakeful step, every mindful act is the direct path to awakening. Wherever you go, there you are.

Our own worst enemy cannot harm us as much as our unwise thoughts. No one can help us as much as our own compassionate thoughts.

The heart is like a garden. It can grow compassion or fear, resentment or love. What seeds will you plant there?

Though we often live unconsciously, “on automatic pilot”, every one of us can learn to be awake. It just takes practice.

The mind contains all possibilities.

If you can’t find the truth right where you are, where else do you think you will find it?

The final quote above is a powerful one for all of us.  We are all seeking to find inner peace and abundance but what  if I told you that right now, if you cannot feel it, if you do not stop and see how perfect your life is now, you may be seeking for the rest of your life.

It’s a challenging thought to know that in accepting everything is perfect right now, the way it is and no more, you will stop searching for the truth and realise it is already within you.

You can go all over the world to see and hear many prophets and teachers or you can go to every meditation course offered in every country and yet, in your busyness to find, you may miss discovering the treasure within.

Be still in your search.  Seek silence instead of noise and busyness.  You may be surprised what you find.