Becoming

“All the plans, all the expectations…. they are all so hard to give up – The promise of who our son was becoming and the realisation that he had now become – and it was now us, who were becoming and he was our teacher.” – Mother who lost her 11-year-old son….

When we are growing up we all have expectations and dreams of who we will become.   The reason they often fall short is only because of who we believe we are deep down.  We dream of the perfect home, the perfect husband, children that obey us and the mortgage that is paid off in full, so why don’t these dreams manifest?

A belief system provides a core set of values on which we base everything we do, say, or believe in life.  Everybody interprets events in life differently, what seem’s difficult to one person doesn’t necessarily seem to traumatise someone else.   Regardless, our belief systems can be empowering or disabling.  They can be built on optimism or pessimism.

“As long as you have life and breath, believe. Believe for those who cannot. Believe even if you have stopped believing. Believe for the sake of the dead, for love, to keep your heart beating, believe. Never give up, never despair, let no mystery confound you into the conclusion that mystery cannot be yours.” – Mark Helprin

Our beliefs determine what we think, what we are capable of, or not capable of.  What our parents taught us as children, or perhaps a traumatic event, or a breach of trust, can sometimes influence our belief system.  For example, we have been raised in a family were there was a lot of negativity, consequently, we end up internalising shame, guilt, and low self-worth.

Our emotional state can be affected by fear and deep-seated anger. It can be really hard to get to the root cause of our hurt that caused the anger and resentment in the first place. It’s easy to blame other people for the hurt, resentment; however, in a lot of cases the truth is just the opposite.

Our unresolved hurt and pain is actually a barrier between us and those we love. In a lot of cases people who have been hurt, are confused as to why they treat people the way they do or why they are treated badly.  People will say “I know I deserve the best in life” but are actually attracting the opposite and not able to receive this abundance of life.

The real damage often happens in our close relationships with those who we love the most.  It’s the hurt, breaches of trust and trauma that prevent us from having close relationships with them.

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” – Anais Nin

When we acknowledge it is only ourselves that block the flow of love and abundance, we can begin to work out where these barriers began and slowly break them down and open our hearts to receive this wonderful abundance that is waiting for us.

So how can we create our dreams when our belief system is unconsciously destroying them?  Affirmations can help but because we have programmed our minds with negative thoughts unconsciously, we don’t understand why our affirmations don’t work.

When you make your affirmations, more importantly, notice the backlash thoughts that come up after you have said them.  Have a sense of forgiveness about them and where they originally came from, and release them each day.

Choose to believe in yourself and the creative power of the Universe that flows through you.  When you become conscious of your thoughts, you will see how they are limiting you.

“We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. We are made up of layers, cells, constellations.” – Anais Nin

Be patient with your becoming.  It will evolve as the layers shed overtime and you will start to see the beauty and the truth and like a butterfly you will be free to manifest your dreams.